It has recently occurred to me that I am a procrastinator. This shouldn't really come as a surprise since the thought came to me while I was sitting in my disgustingly messy, half packed bedroom contemplating how tomorrow I'm moving back into my disgustingly messy, half packed dorm room.
Okay that's actually a lie. I've always known I am a procrastinator. I just always thought that I saved my procrastinating for the really important things like exams and whether or not I want the panini or the wrap for lunch.
Sadly, I am forced to admit this is not the case. I have sunk so low that I am not just procrastinating achieving things. I've actually started to procrastinate goals.
Procrastinate doesn't even look like a word anymore, let me tell you, so from now on I will be replacing it with the phrase Monkey Bopping.
So I was sitting in bed monkeybopping my new years resolutions when I realized that for the past five years or so my resolutions have always looked something like this:
1. Write something of (debatable) measurable talent
2. Sell novel, then take over world. I was never quite sure how this step would work but for some reason I am assured that one will lead to the other.
3. Stay in school, don't do drugs.
4. Stave of death by caffeine addiction.
5. Somehow obtain more money without working any harder or longer.
And finally:
5. Lose [blank] pounds.
Well NO LONGER. I am shaking off this resolution slump and trying new and better resolutions to fail!
At the very least I should lose [blank] kg. I am Canadian, after all.
Honestly, though, I still want all those things, but that's the problem. They are things I want. They are goals. I resolve to have solutions.
I resolve to blog.
And that's all I got right now because I accidentally opened stumble upon and now I am Monkey Bopping again.
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